Key Takeaways:
- The divorce process is complicated, and it’s important to have strategies in place.
- Make an effort to understand the laws in your state state’s laws, like such as jurisdiction and how property is divided.
- Don’t fight for the sake of fighting; know what you want and focus on what matters.
- Be organized. You have court appearances, meetings with attorneys, mediation, and a lot of paperwork.
- Know as much as you can about the state of your collective finances.
- Learn how your state decides child custody.
- Save up if you can. It costs money to submit paperwork and appear in court. There are attorneys fees, and you may need to hire experts.
- Enlist a support system and make a plan for after your divorce is finalized.
There’s a reason people call it “the divorce process.” You’re probably anxious to get the ball rolling, but ending a marriage can be a complicated endeavor with a ton of moving parts. That’s why it’s important to have divorce strategies in place.
Divorce has a massive impact on your future, influencing everything from finances to your living situation to how much you see your kids.
Strategies To Prepare For A Divorce
Odds are, divorce isn’t a surprise. You’ve likely sensed it was coming or considered it for some time. Because of this, you may have time to prepare and figure out what divorce strategies to use.
Maybe this means talking to an attorney ahead of time, getting your finances in order, or figuring out exactly what you need and want from a settlement. Following that train of thought, here are some things to do before filing for divorce.
Know The Divorce Laws In Your State
- Do you know how assets are divided in Washington?
- Do you know what are considered assets in a divorce?
- Did you know that things like airline miles, appliances, and even professional licenses can be considered assets?
- Do you have debt?
- Do you have pets?
- How do you approach child custody?
- What factors are taken into account when it comes to figuring out child support?
- Will spousal support payments be necessary following your divorce?
- Will you need temporary orders?
- Do you have an inheritance?
- Do you have life insurance or retirement benefits such as Social Security or a pension?
- Are you in the military?
These are just some of the things that often affect the final divorce settlement.
Related Reading: The Importance Of Jurisdiction in Divorce
Don’t Fight For Assets Out Of Spite
Is fighting over your extensive bobblehead collection more important than working out a favorable custody arrangement? Probably not, but people can and often do squabble over just about anything in divorce.
Take a moment to honestly assess what’s most important to you and focus your energy on that.
Don’t be a doormat, but know where you’re willing to compromise if necessary. Save the fight for what matters most. No one wants to spend $1000 in fees bickering over things of little consequence.
Save Up, Divorce Can Be Expensive
Even in simple, uncontested divorces, it costs money to submit the paperwork. From there, the expenses only pile up.
Every time you appear in court or at mediation, file or respond to a motion, or pretty much do anything, there’s a cost. Add to that temporary orders, like child support, spousal maintenance, and even setting up a new household.
Related Reading: What Is The Average Cost of Divorce in Washington?
Be Organized, Divorce Gets Messy
With all the moving parts, divorce involves a lot of detail. You have court appearances, meetings with attorneys, mediation, and other commitments. You’ll likely have to take some time off work.
You have to submit various types of paperwork to the opposition and collect others for your case. On top of that, there are forms on top of forms to fill out, and you need ready access to all the pertinent information.
To be blunt, dissolving a marriage is a mess of details. Before the divorce, take the time to organize everything. Sure, it’s a pain in the moment, but in the long run, the organization saves you time and hassle.
Organize Your Financial Records
A big part of being organized is collecting all of your financial records. The division of property is where you split up all shared assets and debts. You need to disclose everything.
- Collect all the related documents, including all accounts, 401(k)s, pensions, insurance policies, and tax records.
- Assemble any debts, including car payments, mortgages, student loans, credit card bills, and anywhere else you owe.
- List significant assets, homes, boats, real estate, jewelry, and even furniture.
- It may even help to break down your work, time, and financial contributions to the marriage.
This has a huge impact on the next phase of your financial life, so before divorce, get your books in order.
Related Reading: How Long Does Divorce Take?
Take Stock Of Assets/Debts
Know as much as you can about the state of your collective finances.
- How much do you make?
- How much does your spouse earn?
- Do you have anything that might be considered separate property or debt?
Figure out where you owe money and which assets are most valuable. Review old tax returns, learn about retirement funds, and understand everything you need to know. Financial strategies play a large part in your divorce.
Divorcing doesn’t automatically alter the financial agreements you and your spouse entered into while married.
Home loans, car loans, anything with both of your names on it stays that way unless you make the change.
Divorce agreements often stipulate that your ex must make certain payments or refinance loans to remove your name. If that happens, great. But if not, it can negatively impact you and your credit.
It never hurts to keep an eye on things to make sure nothing fishy is going on.
Related Reading: Dividing Debt in Washington State
Strategies For Child Custody
When child custody is on the table, emotions become heated, and tempers flare. You’ll want to familiarize yourself with topics like how your state decides child custody and visitation, and how it calculates child support.
If you and your spouse live in separate places, you may need a temporary custody plan. The court may even order temporary child support.
Not only must their daily, regular needs be met—someone has to get them to school—it’s also vital to keep tabs on their emotional well-being during this time.
Hire A Divorce Attorney
Those who want to take a do-it-yourself approach to ending their marriage have more resources now than ever before. But even the simplest, most straightforward cases can become twisted and tangled quickly.
Hiring a divorce attorney to help guide you through the process can be invaluable. This is a crazy, hectic time, and a calm, cool head can suggest divorce strategies, keep raging emotions in check, and steer you towards an optimal outcome.
Related Reading: When to Hire a Divorce Lawyer
Enlist a Support System
If you’re going to make it through a divorce intact, you need a support system in place. It’s easy to fall into bad habits, and men are more likely to do so during a divorce. Know who you can rely on to help keep you stable.
- Who do you turn to for advice, both legal and personal?
- For financial help?
- Or who watches the kids while you meet with an attorney or appear in court?
Also remember, while your attorney is on your side, they’re not your therapist. Have people to talk to when things get tough. This may be family or friends, or even professionals and support groups. It’s often enough to know you’re not in this completely alone.
Strategies For After the Divorce
Think about life on the other side. A little optimism goes a long way. What couldn’t you do before? How’s your life going to improve?
You also have practical concerns to consider. Finances change. You may have to pay child or spousal support, your tax status changes, and you’re paying all the bills from a single paycheck again.
If you have kids, the custody arrangement and visitation impact your schedule and likely your living situation. Plan for your new budget, schedule, and home.
Divorce strategies can help smooth out the process. These are just a few things you can do before divorce to ease financial worries, support your case, and make sure you look after your best interests.
Related Reading: Are Divorce Records Public?
Related Reading: Should You File for Divorce First?

Comments 1
It makes a lot of sense why divorces aren’t usually a surprise. I only say that because of my aunt who is starting to seriously consider getting a divorce. It seems like it would be most helpful for her to consult with an attorney before taking action.