While people divorce for their own reasons, larger themes emerge. Though the specifics may vary in each case, there are common reasons for divorce.
Filing for divorce represents a difficult but often necessary choice. It requires thought, consideration, and support. Many people grapple with this major decision, feel isolated, and struggle with their reasons for wanting to end a marriage.
If this is you, don’t worry, you’re not alone.
5 Most Common Reasons For Divorce
Most often, you don’t divorce for a single reason. One or the other may be the biggest reason you end a marriage, but in most cases, multiple problems combine to destroy a relationship. There is a lot of crossover and these issues often combine to make others even worse.
1. Communication
Communication issues are often one of the first signs of marital trouble.
These problems range from trouble expressing your feelings to a complete lack of interaction.
If you and your spouse struggle to communicate, it’s often beneficial to seek outside help. Couples counselors or therapists may offer advice and aid in overcoming communication challenges.
If your communication difficulties are insurmountable and you decide to end your marriage, you must remain civil during your divorce. Inflammatory and hurtful interactions complicate many cases and make the entire process more problematic.
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2. Financial Stress
Finances are frequently one of the most contentious topics in a marriage. Money woes are also cited as a common reason for divorce.
Money problems kill more marriages than almost any other factor.
Financial issues often compound stress and push couples past the point of reconciliation. If you are considering divorce due to money challenges, take the time to educate yourself before you make a final decision.
Not only is divorce expensive, but it also impacts your finances in many other ways. You may have to move, cover all the bills from a single paycheck, or pay child or spousal support. It even changes how you file your taxes.
It’s important to understand the facts before you file. If you have questions regarding money and divorce, speak with a family law attorney with experience in divorce. They’ll help assess your situation and advise you on how to proceed.
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3. Infidelity
Adultery is painful and destructive. Along with money problems, infidelity is one of the most common reasons for divorce.
Some marriages can withstand cheating, however, many can’t.
If infidelity motivated you to consider divorce, working with a therapist can be beneficial. Trained counselors can help you work through emotional issues and evaluate whether or not your marriage is repairable or if divorce is truly your best option.
While it ruins many relationships, infidelity doesn’t impact the process as much as many people expect. Washington is a no-fault state. This means neither party officially bears responsibility for a failed marriage.
Even though Washington is a no-fault divorce state, if adultery impairs parenting ability, negatively affects your finances, or has a proven tangible influence, it may factor into the final divorce settlement. May being the key word.
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4. Addiction
Battling addiction increases the odds that a marriage will end in divorce. Many studies show statistical evidence that marriages struggling with dependence issues are exponentially more likely to end this way.
Be it alcohol, drugs, gambling, or something else, such compulsive behavior often destroys a marriage.
Addiction usually doesn’t appear alone. It often leads to communication issues, like if your spouse hides their affliction. If your partner pilfers your bank account for a fix, that also causes money problems. Drugs and alcohol frequently also lead people to make poor decisions, like cheating.
These are serious issues that shouldn’t be taken lightly. If you and your spouse deal with addiction, it’s vital to get the necessary help. This may mean counseling or rehab, or it may mean talking to a divorce lawyer.
Educate yourself on how your unique circumstances affect your divorce case. This enables you to protect yourself and make the best decision for you and your family.
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5. Differences in values
People change and evolve over time. When it comes to couples, they don’t always move in the same direction. Or maybe what began as a difference of political opinion or belief you thought wasn’t a big deal, became one.
Our values and beliefs are deeply embedded in who we are as a person.
Couples often realize after marrying that their values and belief systems are incompatible. You may have looked past something because you were so in love and excited to begin a shared life. Later, once that’s faded, you may not be able to overlook an issue you once did.
Or perhaps, after years of marriage, you look at your spouse and don’t recognize the person you see. This incompatibility also often leads to conflict and ultimately leaves couples headed in different directions.
These irreconcilable differences are common reasons for divorce.
Whatever your reasons for divorce, it is important to understand if and how they impact the process. Some cause more of an uproar than others. Know your rights, understand how your circumstances affect your case, and learn as much about the process as possible. This is a tough decision, but one that hopefully helps you find happiness in the future.
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